Justin Sanderson, MA, LPC-S, MBA
In the realm of mental health and substance abuse recovery, our instincts as caregivers, professionals, and loved ones often drive us to correct behaviors that we perceive as harmful or destructive. The desire to help by offering advice, opinions, or corrective actions is a natural response when we see someone struggling. However, while well-intentioned, this approach can often miss the mark, especially when dealing with individuals in moments of crisis. At Stone River Recovery Center, we advocate for a different approach—one grounded in the principle of “connection before correction.”
The Urge to Correct: A Common Human Response
Human beings are problem solvers by nature. When we encounter a situation that seems out of order, especially when it involves someone we care about, our immediate impulse is to fix it. This drive is amplified in high-stakes situations such as mental health crises or episodes of substance abuse. We see behaviors that are self-destructive or harmful to others, and our instinct is to step in with solutions, directives, or even ultimatums.
However, this well-meaning attempt to correct the situation can often lead to resistance, defensiveness, or outright rejection of the advice given. The desired outcome—change in behavior or acceptance of help—is frequently not achieved, and in many cases, the relationship between the helper and the individual in crisis may be strained.
The Science of Connection
Research in psychology and behavioral health consistently supports the idea that connection is a critical precursor to effective intervention. Dr. Brené Brown, a leading researcher on vulnerability and empathy, has emphasized the importance of creating authentic connections as a foundation for meaningful change. Brown’s work, along with that of other experts, suggests that empathy—truly understanding and validating someone’s feelings and experiences without immediate judgment—is key to building the trust required for successful intervention.
A study published in the Journal of Substance Abuse Treatment found that therapeutic relationships characterized by empathy, warmth, and genuine connection were significantly more effective in promoting positive outcomes in substance abuse treatment than those that were more confrontational or directive in nature. The researchers concluded that establishing a strong, empathetic connection with clients was crucial for fostering the openness necessary for lasting change.
Empathy as a Path to Understanding
At Stone River Recovery Center, we understand that before anyone is willing or able to accept help or feedback, there must first be a connection—a bridge of understanding and empathy. This connection is not about agreeing with harmful behaviors or condoning destructive actions. Rather, it’s about recognizing the complex emotional landscape that underlies those behaviors. It’s about saying, “I see you. I understand that you’re struggling. Let’s talk about this.”
Empathy involves listening without the immediate need to correct or advise. It requires us to step into the other person’s shoes, to see the world through their eyes, and to acknowledge the pain, fear, or confusion they may be experiencing. This does not mean that we agree with their choices, but it does mean that we respect their right to be heard and understood.
Connection as the Foundation for Correction
Once a genuine connection has been established, the individual in crisis is more likely to be open to feedback and support. The corrective advice that follows is then more likely to be received as caring guidance rather than judgmental criticism. This approach not only increases the likelihood of positive behavioral change but also strengthens the relationship between the helper and the individual receiving help.
At Stone River Recovery Center, we prioritize this approach in all our interactions with clients. We recognize that in moments of crisis, our role is not just to correct but to connect—to offer a safe, empathetic space where individuals feel understood and supported. Only then can we begin the collaborative work of correction, guiding them towards healthier choices and sustainable recovery.
Conclusion
“Connection before correction” is not just a strategy; it’s a philosophy that informs everything we do at Stone River Recovery Center. We believe that by building strong, empathetic connections, we can create a foundation for real, lasting change. This approach respects the humanity of each individual, acknowledges their unique struggles, and empowers them to take the steps necessary for their recovery journey.
In moments of crisis, before offering advice or correction, we must first seek to connect. It is through this connection that true healing begins.
